How to avoid success in school:

MIDDLE
Come to class without a pen or pencil.

Come to class without your notebook or textbook.

Leave your work in your "other binder" which you don't have with you.

If the teacher writes notes on the board, ask, "Do we have to copy that?"

Stick all class notes., dittos, handouts in the bottom of your book bag or locker.

Lose your homework.

Don't do homework at all.

Do homework in homeroom.

Copy someone else's work.

Write notes to your friends during class.

Daydream instead of listening or participating in class.

Write down "no homework" if you are assigned reading.

Do long-term projects the night before they're due.

When working in a group, waste time and fool around with your friends.

Don't worry about a group project assignment. The other guys will pick up the slack if you don't do your part.

Don't bother to study.

Miss classes whenever possible.

Never call a friend from class to find out what you missed when absent.

Be content with D's --- that's passing!

Don't bother to make up the work you miss when you go to lessons, field trips, or are absent. Just say, "I wasn't here."

Never ask a question if you don't understand or are curious about something.

Talk to your friend during class, especially when the teacher is talking.

Hand in assignments late.

Avoid extra help at all costs.

Go to extra help without your work, notebook or any questions.

When doing school work, just scribble down any old thing Who cares if it's sloppy, incorrect and pathetic.

Get rid of your looseleaf notebook. Just carry around a few pieces of paper folded up in case you have to write anything down.

If the teacher asks a question, or the class is having a discussion, raise your hand and ask to go to the bathroom.

Make sure you're always looking out-the window in case something happens.

Yawn very loudly whenever you feel like it.

Use class time to go through all your papers and clean out your notebook, folder or bag.

Start packing up to leave at least 5 minutes before the end of class.

Do math homework in social studies class.

Don't watch the films you're shown in class. Write notes or just take a nap.

Just call out whenever you feel like saying something. It's best when several people are talking at once.

Do your makeup or fix your hair in class. After all, it's not what you know, it's how you look.

Keep your eyes on the clock, and, just to be sure, always ask, "When does this class end?"

Come running through the door just as the bell rings. Make sure you point out loudly that you're not late.

Write messages, or graffiti, on the desk so you can leave your mark on the world.

Always kick the chair of the person in front of you, or keep poking him in the back with your pen. That way you can be sure at least 2 people at a time are not listening.

Rest your head on your desk and slouch down in your chair so everyone knows how tired/bored you are.

Don't do any work at all. Then, just before the report card comes out, ask what you can do for extra credit!

Blame the teacher for a poor grade.

Be careful not to think. Just ask for the answers.

Wait until the last 2 weeks of the school year to try to make up all the work you didn't do.